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Adult Banter Milestone Cards

Help your adult friend get through the shit days with our Banter Milestone Cards... perfect to capture those moments you want to keep forever! Just to warn you they're NOT for the easily offended but they make a bloody brilliant gift!!


Card Info
- A6 glossy one sided card - Front is matt for you to write on
- 40 cards related to all funny shit adults do
- 350gsm high card
- Packed in a cute box

What's in the box?

  • 40 mother fuckers 
  • 4th load of washing.  Kill me now
  • Another Fucking Take away
  • Bought a house. Skint for 25 fucking years
  • Can't be fucked to adult today
  • Can't cook for shit 
  • Cleaned the whole house, got no fucking praise
  • Dealt with pricks all day today
  • Didn’t want to punch a customer in the face today! Employee of the week!
  • Didn't call in sick today 
  • Didn't tell anyone to fuck off today
  • Drank a whole bottle wine by myself today 
  • Feeling cute might delete later 
  • First Grey Pube - Cunt
  • House Slave
  • Hungover as fuck 
  • I didn't murder anyone today
  • I fucking hate humans
  • I made the mother fucking bed bitches 
  • I'd rather be at home masturbating 
  • I'm having a midlife fucking crisis
  • Just living my debt life 
  • Living my best life - by best I mean really average 
  • Managed to cook a meal today 
  • Managed to wash my hair today
  • Married mother fuckers
  • My body is 99% Prosecco 
  • My house is a fucking mess - not even sorry 
  • Need Botox but can’t fucking afford it
  • Old enough to vote but still too fucking dumb to understand what's going on 
  • Only did this for Insta
  • Practically dead
  • Put the bins out today
  • Shaved my legs & my minge today - someone praise me 
  • So old my fanny doesn’t bleed anymore 
  • Too old to be this fucking childish
  • Voted! Fuck knows what for. 
  • Warning! I'm a cunt when I'm on my period 
  • Wine is my crack
  • Wine o'fucking'clock

Upgrade your pack & add on the 16 Mum Cards for an extra fiver: 

Extra Cards are: 

  • Wish these kids would cook for them fucking selves
  • Didn’t lose my child in in the supermarket today! Top mum...
  • My kids are being twats today 
  • Regretting having these fucking kids today 
  • Fuck the kids, give me a wine!
  • Have kids they say.. It’ll be fun they say!! 
  • Fed my child something other than bread and pasta today! 
  • Made another "mum friend" in playgroup today...FML!
  • School mums are Judgy cunts
  • Got this kid dressed and out of the house before 9… Mum of the year
  • Just had my first uninterrupted shite
  • Hid in the toilet eating secret snacks
  • Forgot to pick the kids up today
  • I pee when I sneeze
  • Can't be fucked to be a Mum today - save me
  • The school run can suck dick!
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